Biography of Sripad B.P. Padmanabha Maharaj

I was born in a Vaishnav family, in a very remote village in Bengal. There was no electricity, no concrete road, and to this day, still no good road, only a market about 3 kilometres away. My grandfather was a landlord and well known locally, and in the surrounding districts. He was a Vaishnav, my father was also a Vaishnav. People used to take dinner before or little after sunset, and all the villagers would be asleep by 8 o’clock. But my grandfather usually did bhajan around that time. He used to do kirtan with instruments, sometimes alone and sometimes the neighbours would come and join happily. Occasionally they would do kirtan the whole night. I love kirtan, from my childhood. My grandfather loved me; when he took prasadam, we took from the same plate; if my elder brother would come in, he would tell him to go. He was a little aristocratic in his lifestyle, people were afraid of him. He passed away in my early years.

I had no interest studying in school, but I liked to read Ramayan and Mahabharat, sometimes Bhagavad Gita. I was afraid of my father, because he would always chastise me for not reading my school books from class. Evening was a very bad time for me; my father employed a private tutor for me and my elder brother, the tutor was the head master of the school where we were studying. I could never prepare for my lessons and almost every day he would beat me. But it couldn’t change my mind. Sometimes my father closed the door, telling me “First complete your lessons then come in and sleep”. When he was asleep I would go outside and steal fruits from our neighbour’s garden; a very good time for stealing as all were sleeping. I had another two friends like me; we stole together and enjoyed eating inside a big garden; we were very famous bad boys.

Thursdays was weekly kirtan organised in alternate houses. 15-20 people would come and sing bhajans of the Mahajans untill 12 at night; then some nice prasadam was served. I hardly ever missed it; I love it so much. At the end of the kirtan they gave Jai Nitai Gaur haribol. I couldn’t understand who are Nitai and Gaur.

In Paush month (December- January) we did Mahamantra kirtan in every house from beginning to end of of our village; two times a day. One shift 8 pm -10pm, another 4 am - 6 am. All the young boys and sometime a few elders also joined. Every house would give puffed rice, jaggery, other sweets and fruits. We collected a big pot made of cane and at the end we would offer it to Radha Krishna and do very loud kirtan and dance, then prasadam distribution both at the same time.

Night was a very good time for me, not only for stealing but also for remembering Krishna’s pastimes, what I heard in the description from the songs I could imagine, so many pastimes of Vrindavan. As if before this life I was in Vrindavan. From my childhood this feeling was there, that I knew the different places in Vrindavan, and I was surprised when I first arrived in Vrindavan in 1988, the same thought came in my mind. Now Vrindavan has changed so much.

The first time I came to Vrindavan I was with a senior disciple of my previous Guru, Nityanand Goldar; as I told before he is a sahajiya, but a good man. He stole me. I asked permission from my mother, but she strongly opposed and she was afraid that if I went to Vrindavan I will not come back. I was also feeling that I would never come back home. Anyhow I was able to escape with him and reached Mathura by the evening; that night we stayed in one babaji ashram near Janmasthan (birth place of Krishna). The next morning we arrived in Vrindavan and we met with a good babaji, we stayed there for 12 days. It’s near Keshi Ghat. He was very affectionate to me. After a few days he asked me, “Will you stay with me? Your mood is very good, I want to educate you; I will admit you to a gurukul (Sanskrit school).” I was very happy, thinking he is telling what my heart is desiring. I immediately told “Yes I can stay in Vrindavan.” He then took me to the Sanskrit school, called Shamananda Vidyalaya, still that school is there, it’s near our temple. He talked with the pandit about my education. That day was a very happy day for me. When I joined full-time to my Gurudev's mission, SCSMath 2011, I went back there to read, but there was a different pandit.

Anyhow I expressed my desire to Nityanand Prabhu; he strongly opposed and me told me impossible, your parents will file a case against me and send me to jail. I told him they didn’t see that I came with you, you will not have any problems. You go back, I will not go. But he was afraid and didn’t agree. When we were leaving, the Babaji Maharaj was almost crying, I also was crying. Now it is not the Vrindavan I remember, it has changed so much.

Our house was on the bank of a river, I heard someone playing the flute at night, I couldn’t sleep, I came out from the house to look at the river thinking it as the Yamuna and the flute sounded as if it is Krishna’s flute. I never heard that type of sweet sound in my whole life. That sound made me mad to go to Vrindavan, my only aim of life was to go to Vrindavan. But not possible, I didn’t know how to go. My mother was very anxious that I may run from home to Vrindavan forever. Maybe because she loves me so much, father and others always chastised me as I was useless. In my mind, always thinking I have to go to Vrindavan. From my childhood I felt that family life is very painful, at times I could see no one is happy, only Vrindavan is the happiest place.

Suddenly my mind changed; one day my father called me and was crying, that time I was in class Eight and I failed in an examination as usual, it happened in every examination; My father told me, “I tried so much to educate you but you do not care, we have so much land but I don’t want you to work in the field, get a government job and live a comfortable life, this is my pain,” this way he was crying. I was thinking I am giving so much pain to my father. So I started to study very seriously and my next examination I became 2nd topper in the class; all the teachers were surprised. I got their affection later, from then on I stood 1st always. 10th school final, very good result, 1st division with 3 star marks. Respected persons come to see me and give me their blessings. I saw my father’s smiling face. Then I did engineering and joined as a lecturer in engineering college, then associate professor, this way.

One day my father said “I never imagined you would reach such a high position.” I think all are happy with me but I am not happy, from my childhood I was searching for Him, for Krishna. Before I took initiation from the family Guru then another Guru; they were all imitators. They love me so much; actually everywhere I got so much love and affection. Then I connected with ISKCON, 3 years, but I felt they were unable to connect me with Krishna, then I left and started searching. July 2006 in the summer vacation, I came to Vrindavan and stayed in the ISKCON temple with my friend, Krishna Balaram Prabhu, he was an engineer before he joined ISKCON as a brahmachari. I consulted with him about my frustration. With a very sad mood I went walking to Keshi Ghat from ISKCON. After taking bath in the Yamuna I prayed and crying to Sri Radharani; please guide me to a bonafide Guru. Then I came to visit Radha Damodar temple, after that I went on the way to Seva Kunj and I saw Sri Chaitanya Saraswat Math and Mission.

Krishna Balaram Prabhu told me that this Math has a very nice Chaitanya Charitamrita and I should buy a copy from there. Seeing the name I entered and met with Sagar Maharaj (Bengali). I bought one copy and talking with him felt peaceful in my mind; I thought maybe some good devotee’s are here and asked who is your Acharya. He told now our Gurudev is in Nabadwip, telling, he is the best Acharya, very exalted devotee. It was July 2006; next Gaura purnima I went to Mayapur with my mother, brother and his family and we stayed in the ISKCON temple. The next day I alone went to Nabadwip SCSMath to meet with Srila Gurudev. I saw Sagar Maharaj there and asked where is your Gurudev. He immediately took me to Srila Gurudev’s bhajan kutir. First time when I saw Srila Gurudev I felt he is not from this mundane world, he came from Vrindavan. I must have to take shelter at his lotus feet and asked for initiation. Srila Gurudev told yes, today is a good day, you prepare and come. I asked permission to bring my mother and others. The same day Srila Gurudev gave initiation to all of us. Sagar Maharaj told if you want you can take both initiation the same day Gurudev says, but I was little afraid. Next year Gaura purnima day I took second initiation. In July 2008 I got darshan of Srila Gurudev in Dum Dum Park Kolkata, and asking for seva, thinking I have one month vacation I can do some seva; seva means cleaning of the clothes of Srila Gurudev like this. Srila Gurudev told no, you continue your job. Also I told almost one and half years I am chanting but not feeling devotion, Srila Gurudev boldly told me “You must get devotion.” In 2009 I got darshan of Srila Gurudev in his bhajan kutir in Nabadwip. Again I asked, please give me some seva; immediately he told, "You serve in Vrindavan, Govardhan also you can serve. "That time he talked for a long time with me; telling “very difficult it is to stay in Vrindavan, summer and winter so extreme; but no problem for you. Go and serve there, you will not face any problems.”

I was afraid to go to Vrindavan, and my job at that time I was an Assistant Professor in the Electronics department. But all the time I was feeling pain in my heart, Srila Gurudev told me to go to Vrindavan but yet I had not gone, and I feel ashamed to be in front of Srila Gurudev, I knew Gurudev understood my mind. When Srila Gurudev entered his eternal pastimes I felt great shock; I resigned from my job and went to the temple, August 2010. First Nabadwip then after 2 months I came to Vrindavan. That time there was so much disturbance in our Math. Every one fighting with each other, fighting, court cases, a very sad condition. I stayed 8 months in Vrindavan, seeing the devotees' behaviour, I became frustrated and joined my job again. But always remembering Gurudev’s order, feeling guilty within myself. One day I got an order from higher authority - not to be afraid to come. In 2016 I made a decision to go back forever. Many things happened, but Srila Gurudev always save me, giving guidance.

I stayed in different villages of Brajmandal for about a year, to focus on my practicing Krishna Consciousness without disturbance. It was when I was in the village of Uchagaon that I found what I came for. But one night Srila Gurudev called me in a dream, “Come to Govardhan, you will get everything here.” From that day I am serving in Govardhan by the mercy of Srila Gurudev and the devotees.